Bucky Badger Tears Biceps in Blowout Victory

Bucky Badger Tears Biceps in 70-3 Blowout Victory

By John Beadle, HP Sports Writer

Sept 25, 2010 - Madison, Wis. (HP) – Buckingham U. Badger (Bucky Badger) was in agony and rushed to the UW-Hospital moments after the University of Wisconsin’s Big Ten football victory over hapless Austin Peay. The UW-Madison football team beat Austin Peay 70-3 Saturday, in their last non-conference contest before embarking on their Big Ten conference schedule next week. As is the tradition in Madison, Bucky Badger does as many pushups as the football team has points after each score. In a 70 point game that equals 385 pushups in total.

“I was starting to feel a bit sore in my arms”, remarked Bucky writhing in pain from the stretcher, “after we went up 63-3 and I’d completed three hundred-something pushups. Sixty-three pushups in a row is pretty difficult, I’d never done more than fifty before – especially after a full day of doing pushups. It’s not super easy doing them hoisted in the air either. But with the crowd cheering and all – you get pretty pumped up for it. But after that, my arms weren’t doing so well and honestly I just hoped we would run out the clock and end the game.” Unfortunately for Bucky, the Badgers scored again on a Montee Ball 10 yard scamper late in the fourth quarter, putting the Badgers up 70-3.

‘Holy cr*p – no way I’m going to be able to do 70 pushups’ is what one cheerleader said she heard come out of Bucky’s mouth. “He wasn’t real pleased as we hoisted him up on the red board when he started to do his 70 in a row. But he did it. His back wasn’t real straight on the last 10 and he really didn’t go down fully to do a proper pushup but we understood.”

The UW-Hospital reported that Bucky had torn both of his posterior glenoid labrums and the most likely cause was doing way too many pushups for a mascot. The UW doctor noted that mascots should only do a moderate amount of pushups because they are not generally in very good shape.

Bucky’s recovery time is expected to take several weeks, leaving a void for the Badgers upcoming games in the mascot department. Wally the Weasel who looks a bit like a badger was unavailable for comment but was rumored to be a potential fill-in for Bucky for the game against the Spartans next Saturday. Mascot Director of Operations, Bill Smart, noted that Wally and Bucky were about the same size and once they put Wally into the red and whites “it will be really hard to tell it isn’t Bucky.”

For other mascot related news see: Business Mascot Attacked